A man recently accused me of “mansplaining” to him.
For those of you don’t know what this is, it’s:
explaining something (usually to a woman)
That’s what it boils down to. Some will add other qualifiers to it, such as:
explaining something the person knows about
being patronising while you do it
… But it seems that this isn’t needed. Even without, you can still “mansplain”, it seems.
So, I was guilty of mansplaining, it seems. Why? The man said he doesn’t know what something is. I explained it.
He didn’t know what “hygge” was. I told him: Hygge is a Danish word. It’s like “a feeling of cosiness and contentment”. I gave examples:
Being in a warm room with blankets when it’s snowing is hygge.
Being with friends “hanging out” and enjoying company is hygge.
For some reason, he took offence to it and complained about it. Well, I take issue with people complaining about “mansplaining”.
The term itself is stupid.
Women and men have a tendency to explain things. Sometimes to people who know about the subject. Sometimes being patronising.
If you accuse a woman of mansplaining, many say only men can do that.
If you say womansplaining, many say this isn’t a real thing. Well, neither is mansplaining. But oh well.
It’s also an ad hominem: an attack against the person. A male can’t help but be male. You haven’t said anything other than “STOP TALKING TO ME I DON’T LIKE IT WHEN MEN EXPLAIN THINGS ME!”. It’s your problem if you think like that. It’s training you to be a perpetual victim. That doesn’t work in the real world. It just makes you alone and hated.
Being a man or woman has no impact on the argument. Neither does being anything else. Is it right? That’s what matters. Nothing else.
When someone is telling you something, that has nothing to do with them being mean. They’re trying to help you by teaching you something. If you deny it, you’re refusing help because of who they are. That’s beyond stupid.
Worse than stupid, it’s shameful. It’s revelling in ignorance and hating on those who try to help you. If you can’t take people knowing stuff, that’s your problem, and it’s a pathetic one. Learning is good. I, for one, hate ignorance. If someone can help educate me, I am glad.
If someone is “talking down to you”, that has nothing to do with being a man or woman. They’re being a dick. Not mansplaining. Not womansplaining.
After the man accused me of mansplaining, what did I do?
First, I laughed at him for being idiotic, like he deserved.
Second, I asked him, “did you just assume my gender?”.
He stopped talking when other people found it funny.